IF THE ONLY PRAYER YOU SAID IN YOUR LIFE WAS "THANK YOU", THAT WOULD SUFFICE. ~Meister Eckhart

Thursday, March 20, 2008

03.20.08

We had gone for a walk in the snow down into the bowl of Bryce Canyon in Utah earlier that day. After a quick shower in the hotel room, we headed down to the restaurant for dinner. Our boots were soaked from the snow, so we wore our flip-flops to the restaurant. The hostess was the first to notice. "Hey you've got the wrong shoes on!" she admonished. "There's snow outside!" "Yeah I know. We're from California," Chip replied. "Humph," the hostess sniffed, as she showed us our table. When our server approached our table, the hostess was right there again, quick to pint out our inappropriate footwear to him. We tried to explain that we had been hiking and our boots were wet, but it only set her off more. "I certainly hope you don't wear those," she said. "There's snow on the trails." Then she trotted back to her station. Our server didn't care. He listened to the story about our hike, told us one of his own, and kept our glasses full. Later during the meal, the hostess guided another couple past our table and pointed at our feet. "Look at these people," she said. "They're from California and they're wearing the wrong shoes!" We giggled all through dinner that night, all because our hiking boots got soaked. Sometimes what's appropriate for a situation just doesn't work for you and you're forced to improvise. Wear the wrong shoes if you must, but don't miss the party because of what someone else might think. ~from The Language of Letting Go
Today I am grateful...
  • that today is Boston's birthday! She gets to celebrate on this, the first day of spring.
  • that the scheduled speaker for the meeting yesterday canceled and in her place was Ron W who celebrated his 26th AA birthday and told his story based on the 12 steps. Ron is a miracle having survived Parkinson's, a stroke and a heart attack all during the past year and a half.
  • that I am working on a deal for another large commission painting
  • that I know life is cyclical, but that doesn't give me the answer when I feel angst ridden like I have for the past few days. But it's not really angst, it's more like an uncomfortableness with everything. And I know it will pass because it always has. I keep doing all the stuff I have been doing to stay spiritually healthy but I guess some days the disease has a firmer grip on my psyche than others. Okay, onward...

Fear and guilt are you only enemies. Love and awareness are your true friends. Yet do not confuse the one with the other, for one will kill you, while the other gives you life. ~Conversations with God

9 comments:

Syd said...

Some days I have discomfort too. Like something just isn't right within me. I think those are the days that I work hard on my inventory. Where am I spiritually? What am I feeling? Is it real? I get back on track after a bit. And remember that this too shall pass.

dAAve said...

When I feel uncomfortable like that, it manifests itself in isolating me from the world. It passes much faster than previously. And it happens less often. My recovery program kicks in (usually without my knowledge) and I get back to my abnormal self.

Pam said...

I guess we just both have some angstism going on.
I wish the passing was just a little faster.
Maybe we should be eating more cake.

Zane-nawwaa said...

The last sentence of Letting Go reminds me of Garth Brooks "The Dance". I'm trying to find Pam and that damned cake. So elusive.

Mary Christine said...

hmmm. I am going to have some cake on Easter. I think you should too Scott.

FunkySlick said...

I found your blog and in this huge blogosphere, I am so happy to have stumbled upon this true motivational outlet.

I have added you to my blogroll and thank you for your contribution to my day.

Bill said...

We're not a glum lot, but we sure are moody. I think we all know exactly how you have been feeling, Scott. Hang in there, pal!

The first excerpt reminds me of hearing a man in a meeting say that people should "dress up" for speaker's meetings to show respect. I thought of how I could barely get out of bed, brush my teeth, and get halfway cleaned up when I first came to AA. My Tourette's kicked in and I blurted out "I don't care if someone shows up in a robe & slippers as long as they get here." Thanks for that story.

Scott Crawford said...

Funny how the only thing that could bring me to my knees all those years past was a dire need to hug a commode. Now, the slightest hint of that old Restless-Irritable-Discontentedness and I'm down asking for serenity in a heartbeat. Which reminds me, I need to vacuum today.
Peace, love and sunny skies to all.

Trailboss said...

WOW, great comments from everyone.

Oh, where is the cake?