I came into AA with no conditions on my sobriety. Not to save a job or a marriage, or my standing in the community. I came here to save my life, and I'm real grateful for that. I see so many people come in here for other reasons and when that works out and it still doesn't fix them ... a lot get drunk. ~Sean A.
Today I am grateful...
- to discover that I still use manipulative behavior, something I thought I had left behind. I used it yesterday when I was not getting what I wanted. See the quotes following.
- that I have regularly attended AA meetings for nearly three years so that when I have a busy week, like last week, I don't get too wonky when I have to miss a few meetings here and there.
- that my Higher Power walks ahead of me
- that what I have is what I want
Without understanding our motives, we can easily lapse into behavior aimed at manipulating others. Sulking is a means of letting others know we are displeased and forcing them to attempt to win our approval. Flattery is a false expression of approval that we don't really feel…. Giving others good strokes for our own purpose. Withholding deserved praise is a means of putting others down, something we're likely to do because of our jealousy. Manipulative behavior is almost always selfish behavior. IT is usually a false means of trying to get our own way. It is certainly an immature way of dealing with people and situations. ~Walk in Dry Places
I choose to love others, as God would. This means no severe judging, no resentments, no malicious gossip, no destructive criticism. ~SweetyZee
10 comments:
I don't understand.
I am not allowed to flatter someone, but I'm also not allowed to withhold praise. Mother, will I ever get this stuff?
Manipulation is my strongest character defect. Sometimes, I don't even notice that I'm doing it. Man oh man this program requires a hell of alot of work.
On Saturday I resisted the very strong urge to manipulate my daghter through guilt and tears...Whew! Does ANYONE know Manic Monday? just kidding...love and HUGS
Who me, manipulate others? Yep, yep, I can relate.
LOL daave... I love it
this is something good to bring up. Its another way to recogonize our motives. thanks for sharing Scotty.. and Happy monDAY
ps had a weird dream about you last night...??? LOL
I'm sooo good at manipulation sometimes I don't know I'm doing it, until someone BRAVE and loving enough says hey! good post
Thanks dude for pointing all that out. Jeez its like everybreath i take is for all the wrong reasons. Guess i'll just have to do the best I can. Hope your Monday is better than mine with all this truth. {just kidding}.
That quote from Sean A is superb. I'ts 101% my story.
Consider it stolen and posted at my place.
:-)
Hope you're having a fab and groovy Monday.
Manipulate? What, not people like us :) Well thru this new discovery I hope that you can laugh at yourself. It is one of the best ways to heal and grow through humility.
Muah!
Being direct and honest is a big job.
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